“Houston, our monopropellant injector is leaking; the fire’s now breached the hull. We have a matter of minutes before complete mechanical failure.”
“Gemini, mission control is going to go ahead and recommend an emergency landing.”
“Houston, it sounded like you suggested we attempt a crash landing onto a moving commercial spacecraft. Please confirm.”
“Gemini, this is a passenger cruise liner, which is an incredibly reliable mode of upmarket transport. We can’t think of a safer place for you to be should anything go wrong during touchdown…”
“Roger, Houston. Bracing for impact...”
Dear Aunty Stanky: If we discovered a means to teach dogs to reason as do humans, should we? Do we risk corrupting caninekind or is it our duty to assist expanding man's best friend's appreciation of life? BARKING ABOUT IN THE BIG APPLE…
Dear Aunty Stanky, I woke up this morning to discover that I am omnipotent. What can I do? Dear um, ? I guess your precarious position with the Universe makes you unable to give a stunning sobriquet, but no matter. …
“Stool transplants?” I asked my agent. “Please say you’re joking.”
Angela shook her head. “I swear I’m not making this up. When researchers transferred the stools of outgoing mice into anxious mice, the recipients became more outgoing. And when they gave people fecal transplants for digestive disorders, they found the same thing—recipients take on characteristics of their donors. Point being: the microbes in our guts exert significant influence over our personalities.
"It seems that you are largely what’s in your gut. And if you really want to be a star, you need to have star stuff inside you.”
The job market was so dried up, you could only hope and pray for some shitty, part-time shiftwork underneath some dilapidated footbridge. The days of getting a comfy, monster-under-the-bed type job were long gone. Holding out for your own closet to scare out of? Hah! What are you smoking?
The market bubble had gone bust, and every night, the streets in my neighbourhood were getting worse; monsters were slinking in every shadowy alleyway, cracked out and strung out and begging for your last dime.