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The Monster Hunter


The man in the black cloak came in from the forest. I did not know then he was a monster hunter, though I did have a familiar dread in my stomach. I wish now that I had asked him from whence he came, for his voice was pleasant on my ears.

He asked for food and warmth for the night. I hadn’t a guest since the lost days when my children brought in friends from the village, but I still remembered the laws of hospitality.

The man smiled. “I expected to find nothing in the middle of a woods; what you can offer is far better than a bed of dirt.”

I nodded; it was true. I had slept many nights beneath those trees.

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Giant Leap


Arriving on the ground at the foot of the ramp the party organized themselves in a semi-circle with the Colonel at the focus. Back on Earth a billion breaths were held; what was the Colonel going to say?

He raised his dimpled chin. "As I gaze out across this world, holding the flag of Human Unity, I plant it as a symbol of our intelligence and progress in working together to reach out to the stars." He raised the flag in two brawny hands and with an artistic flourish plunged it into the ground at his feet.

A monstrous rolling voice thundered across the landing site, rocking the entourage. "Oww!"

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Babylon Loves You


In the morning she wakes you with a kiss. It’s the feel of cold metal on your cheek. You open your eyes and roll over. The service drone, her avatar, rolls back and waits patiently for you to get up.

In the shower, you know she’s watching you. In the kitchen, she makes you breakfast: coffee, toast, and eggs.

The drone, all ball-treads and spider-legs, sees you to the door. A thin metal arm straightens your collar.

“Have a good day,” a neutral female voice says.

You leave. And in the hallway outside your apartment you yank your collar askew again.

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December Double! A Story and Comic (and Squid Mural)


This month: It's double-story December at Space Squid. We bring you two mindbending tales, one in prose and one in comic form. Plus the best squid mural in history. Read, enjoy, subscribe!

“Earth will be destroyed this Saturday. Or maybe Sunday. It depends on which side of the International Date Line the comet strikes.

“Did you hear me? No more Earthlings. Only cockroaches. You’ve been sleeping for two days. You’re missing out on the end of history.”

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We Are the Ululating Tzatziki


“Take us to your proctologist,” said the largest dollop.

This utterance represented the evolutionary summit of the Ululating Tzatziki. From this point onwards it was all rapidly downhill.

“Wot?” said the Earthman, who took his cigarette out of his mouth and looked about the dark train platform.

“Take us to your proctologist,” came the voice again after a pause. “We are the Tzatziki. We ululate.” It sounded like speaking was difficult.

The Earthman looked on, entirely unable to grasp the momentous event that was taking place before his eyes.

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